


Beneath the Mask

by DaisyDogOx



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Gen, Persona 5 Spoilers, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Solitary Confinement
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:29:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22064059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaisyDogOx/pseuds/DaisyDogOx
Summary: Not even the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts could last against a system meant to break him. And he wasn't the leader of the Phantom Thieves anymore. He was Akira Kurusu, an ordinary high-school student who had no idea what he was about to face.or, a more in-depth and accurate look at what happened to Akira when he was in solitary confinement
Comments: 7
Kudos: 125





	Beneath the Mask

“Akira Kurusu, you’re hereby under arrest on charges of being the leader of the group known as the Phantom Thieves.”

Being arrested the second time wasn’t nearly as bad as the first, he realized as they read him his rights. Before he’d been shoved into the back of a police cruiser with little warning. Now he was turning himself in and they were treating him much better. Even as they broke out the handcuffs and led him out of the interrogation room and into a holding cell, they were considerably gentler. _Maybe changing the hearts of the masses was worth it after all…_

He was torn from his musings as two officers stopped in front of him, one holding his bag. They began to rifle through it and he bit his lip.

“One pair of gym clothes for Shujin Academy. Several textbooks for various subjects. Loose pencils, pens, erasers, and the like.”

Sojiro had been in such a hurry to get him to the station that morning in the hopes that he could open Leblanc for the afternoon, that he hadn’t gotten a chance to empty his bag of all his school supplies. Not that it mattered, because they got stuck in traffic anyway.

_Just like that first day._

“And what would this be? Doesn’t look like a normal school notebook.”

“My probation notebook,” he said quietly. “I’ve been recording my daily activities for the past year, just as the court ordered.”

They thumbed through it and he was glad he decided not to record any activities about the Phantom Thieves in it. He could explain spending nights in Shinjuku because he was visiting Chihaya and getting his fortune told. It would be harder to talk his way out of the metaverse.

“Alright, nothing suspicious. This will be transported with you and held onto by the facility staff until your release. Whenever that may be.”

He kept his head down. He already knew he was going to be spending a long time wherever they sent him.

“For now you’ll spend the night here until all the paperwork is finalized and transportation is arranged.”

The officers dropped the bag just out of reach and sneered as they left. As soon as he was sure he was alone he pressed himself against the bars and reached for it.

“C’mon,” he muttered, “almost there…”

The cuffs were in the way and he wished he had a lockpick on him.

_I don’t even know if I can pick locks outside the metaverse,_ he thought. _Do any of those skills translate to the real world? Or was it all for nothing?_

He twisted his arms just right and the cuffs slid between the bars, and he nearly fell on his face. At least he could reach the bag.

He held the notebook to his chest and scanned the halls again, making sure nobody was coming before opening it.

_April 3_   
_The court gave me this notebook and told me I had to record all my daily activities in it. I don’t know what they expect me to be doing when I’m under probation for the next year. At least I’ll get to see Tokyo. I wonder how different it is from home._

_April 9_   
_Today I met Sojiro Sakura, the man who will be taking care of me for the next year. He doesn’t seem to like me very much. He’s taking me to see my new school tomorrow, so at least he likes me enough to do that. Or maybe he’s just getting paid for it._

_May 14_   
_Today is the last day of exams, but before we got to school Ann was being followed by a guy named Yusuke. Ryuji and I fended him off, but it turns out he’s an artist who wanted Ann to model for him. He’s a little eccentric, but nice._

_June 16_   
_The student council president wanted to talk with me today. I think she was afraid of me because of the rumors of my arrest. She needed my help finding out what was happening to the students, and it turns out people were being blackmailed into smuggling drugs. Tokyo is more dangerous than I expected._

_July 31_   
_I met Sojiro’s daughter, Futaba. She was a shut-in for the longest time so she doesn’t really understand people or social cues. She doesn’t seem to get along with Yusuke because they both think they’re acting normal when neither of them really are. It’s funny, in a way. I think my summer vacation just got a lot more interesting._

_September 13_   
_Today we learned that Principal Kobayakawa committed suicide. I wonder if it was one of those mental shutdowns the news have been talking about? Morgana is also missing, so Sojiro and I left some food out for him. I hope he comes back soon, doing homework without him meowing at me is boring._

_October 21_   
_The police came to school today asking questions about the Phantom Thieves._

_November 23_   
_Things are going wrong. I can’t keep doing this._

_December 24_   
_I nearly forgot tomorrow is Christmas. So much is happening at once. I won’t get to spend it with the others, Sae-san told me I have to turn myself in to the police. I thought we were finally going to be free, but I have to do this in order to protect them. It’s just a shame that my probation was nearly up, and now I’ll probably go to juvenile hall. I can’t bring myself to tell everyone. I feel bad about making Sojiro do it, but I just can’t._

He didn’t even realize he was crying until the tears hit the page.

“I should have said goodbye to them,” he whispered. “I should have told them…”

He didn’t hear the footsteps until it was too late and an officer stopped in front of him. “Where did you get that?” they demanded.

He hugged the book to his chest and shook his head, blinking the tears away. “They said it’s mine.”

“You’re not allowed to have anything,” they snapped, fumbling with the lock. “That might be going with you but it’s going to be kept with the staff the whole time.”

They wrenched the book from him and there was little he could do with his hands still cuffed.

“I don’t think you understand what’s happening here. You’ve admitted to being the leader of the Phantom Thieves, which has a lot of crimes tied to it. The murder charge may have been dropped but you still have destrction of property, possession of weapons, violations of radio law… You’re going to be spending a long time in a correctional facility. In fact, they might just keep you there until you turn twenty and then transfer you to a real prison.”

His eyes went wide and the officer smirked.

“Try to keep that in mind, hmm? Or we’ll find reasons to extend your sentence even further.”

Then they were gone and they’d taken not only the notebook, but his bag and everything else with it. He curled his knees to his chest and sighed. The reality was finally setting in, and he wasn’t sure he’d made the right choice after all.

* * *

“So we lost not only Morgana, but Akira too?”

“There wasn’t much else he could do,” Sojiro said. “If what Niijima-san said was right, then you’d all be targeted if he hadn’t turned himself in. The police might have even fabricated a crime just to arrest you. It’s better for only one of you to get caught rather than all of you.”

“But with his previous record--”

“It’s unlikely he’ll get a good sentence, I know.”

They were all silent.

“This is _bullshit_!” Ryuji said at last. “Akira has risked his life and his reputation again and again for us, and now none of it matters because the cops still think we’re criminals?”

“We did break a lot of laws, and it’s difficult to prove anything without the metaverse now--”

“I don’t care about any of that! Wasn’t his initial assault charge false anyway? We can at least prove that, can’t we?”

“That case is more than a year old and Shido made sure the name of the woman was never mentioned so that nobody could ask her for the true story. How do you expect to track someone like that down?”

“It happened in his old neighborhood, didn’t it? We can ask people there if they remember anything!”

“ _Ryuji_ ,” Ann said sharply. “Do you even know where he lives?”

“...No.”

“Has he ever told you anything about himself? He helped us with all of our problems but we couldn’t even be bothered to ask where he came from.”

“I think that’s all the more reason we should do this,” Haru said suddenly. “So that once he’s free we can meet up and ask him all the things we didn’t get to.”

“We’re still back where we started,” Makoto said. “We don’t know where he lives, so we can’t ask people if they remember anything.”

“I think I can help you there.”

They’d all forgotten Sojiro was there.

“What kind of a guardian would I be if I didn’t even know where my charge was coming from? All the official paperwork is back at the house.”

“Could we see it?”

“I don’t think I’m allowed to show you all the paperwork for legal reasons, but I’m sure I can copy the address.”

Ann grinned. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

He turned back to his coffee. “When he first came, I thought he was a delinquent like everyone else. I want to apologize for treating him so poorly. Anything I can do to help you get him out of there sooner, I will.”

“Then we’ve got our plan. I think we’re done for today.”

“Hey, before you leave… it’s Christmas,” Sojiro said, refusing to look at them. “Have some coffee and curry. On the house. It’s… well, it’s too quiet with both the kid and the cat gone.”

Makoto half-smiled. “I think some curry would be lovely.”

* * *

The cuffs fell away and he rubbed at his wrists. He didn’t get much time to recover before something was thrown at him.

“Those are your clothes. You get two sets, so be sure to keep them clean. Seeing as you’ll be in solitary confinement, there’s no need to go over the schedule. Get changed and you’ll be taken to your room.”

He glanced around. “Is there a bathroom, or--?”

“No.”

“I’m not comfortable undressing in front of people--”

“You can strip down and put on the clothes, or we can do it for you. Either way, it’s happening here. Now do it.”

He swallowed thickly as he realized it wasn’t just an empty threat, and tried not to flinch as the air hit his skin. He got dressed as quickly as he could but still felt them staring, and his face burned. He hated the scars now marring his body. The bruises had faded to reveal marks that wouldn’t, and he felt like some kind of spectacle.

He tried to grab his other clothes off the floor but someone had already gotten them.

“Will I get those back?” he asked quietly.

Nobody answered him.

He kept his head down and followed after the guard until they stopped in front of an unmarked door.

“This will be your room. As per the number on your uniform, you’ll now be referred to as Number Nineteen. The day starts at 7:00 and room inspection is at 7:30. Your meals will be brought to you, and you’ll begin working tomorrow. Anything else will be explained later.”

“Working?”

He didn’t even see the blow, but he felt the sting a moment later. The meaning was clear and he kept quiet as he entered the room, and watched as the door was closed. Only then did he take a good look at the room that would be his home for awhile.

It wasn’t _awful_ , he decided. It had a futon folded up against the wall, and a little table with a clock above it. The back corners held a toilet and a sink, and if he sort of squinted he could see out the dirty window. Of course all he could see was the wall surrounding the facility.

It certainly wasn’t anything like his room at Leblanc had been, but that hadn’t been anything like his room back home and he’d gotten used to that. He’d be fine, so long as he kept his head down and did as he was told.

He only wished, he thought as sat leaning against the wall, that he knew how long his sentence was going to be. It was harder to remain optimistic when there was no end in sight.

He must have nodded off, because he was woken up by a sharp blow to the head. The fog cleared quickly enough and he looked up at the guard, eyes wide. That earned him another hit and he bit his tongue, trying to keep from crying out.

“You are not to look at any personnel and remain silent unless spoken to first. Understood?”

He gave a slight nod.

“ _Understood_?”

“Yes… sir.”

A tray was haphazardly dropped on the table and he didn’t dare lift his head until he heard the door shut again.

The tray looked like it had once held his dinner, but the drop had scattered much of it. He was too hungry to care, having not gotten anything for breakfast or lunch at the police station. It wasn’t much more than rice and mackerel but it was a welcome change from curry for every meal.

_Sojiro would have me washing dishes for a month if he heard me say that,_ he thought with a small smile.

He ate quickly and pushed the tray aside, and started investigating the desk. There wasn’t anything interesting, and he quickly gave up and leaned against the wall again. His eyes started to close again and he shook his head to clear it. He had to stay awake, if the reaction from earlier meant anything. Only then did the dull pain register, and he realized he’d slept with his contacts in.

_What am I supposed to do about that when they won’t even let me look up, let alone speak? And how am I supposed to pass the time if I’m not allowed to sleep and I’ve been given nothing? They mentioned something about work but I haven’t heard anything else about it… Maybe because it’s my first day? I hope so, otherwise I might go insane from boredom…_

He heard the click of the lock and instinctively sat up straight, and then forced his head down.

He heard the guard laugh. “Suppose you’re not a complete lost cause if you’re finally picking up on how things work around here. Keep your head down and follow me, and don’t say a word.”

He did as he was told and nearly walked into the guard as they stopped short in front of a door like all the others.

“Beyond here is the bath. You’re to strip for inspection, and should you pass you’ll be given your things. Don’t talk to any of the other inmates.”

“I--”

“Don’t speak unless asked a question,” they snapped, and he flinched, anticipating a hit that never came.

He stepped inside and bit the inside of his cheek in an attempt to distract himself with the pain as he was inspected and handed a towel.

He risked a quick look up and saw that several others were doing the same, all looking at him. He chose a spot as far from them as he could, but the whispers traveled far in the otherwise silent room.

_“Do you think that’s really him?”_

_“He’s so much younger than I expected.”_

_“Really just a high schooler?”_

Thankfully the water drowned them out and he just stared ahead, letting everything else fade into the background.

He didn’t even realize someone was talking to him until they were right next to him.

“--teen? Nineteen, follow me.”

His body seemed to move on its own and he did as he was told, glancing to one side. Nobody dared stare at him while the guards were watching.

He was led into a small room off the back with nothing more than a chair.

_What now? Some other form of hazing or humiliation?_

A pair of scissors was produced and his heart raced.

_It’s just hair,_ he tried to reassure himself. _It’ll grow back eventually, this isn’t worth getting potentially stabbed over because you didn’t want to get a haircut._

The very real threat of violence was enough to calm him down, or at least enough to sit still as the scissors got close to his face.

He closed his eyes and tried to keep his breathing even, and finally the _click_ of the scissors stopped.

The first thing he noticed was that his ears were cold. He resisted the urge to immediately feel how much they’d cut off. There was enough laying at his feet that he had a pretty good idea.

He was shown back to his room and handed a notebook and a pen as he stepped back inside.

“Anything written or drawn in that will be inspected. It’ll be collected in the morning.”

Then he was alone again, and the mask finally broke. His shoulders slumped as the exhaustion of the day caught up to him and he ran a hand through his hair only to find that most of it was gone.

He turned to the notebook on the desk and began to write out of instinct.

_December 26_   
_Merry Christmas, I didn’t get to write yesterday because I spent it in a police station. That would be bad enough, except I’m writing here because I’m in solitary confinement in some kind of juvenile detention center. It’s only the first day and I fear I won’t survive here. I’ve had my personal belongings raided, I’ve been stripped and assigned a number, and they cut my hair. I’d heard that the system was meant to break you piece by piece, but I never believed it until now. I got to interact with a lot of people for what’s supposed to be solitary, but I suppose that’s because it’s my first day. I don’t think I’ve ever missed Morgana telling me to hurry up and go to bed more. I miss them all._

“Lights out!” came a voice from the hall, and a minute later he was in the dark. He laid back on his futon and looked up at the ceiling.

He hadn’t realized how much those glow in the dark star stickers from Yusuke had meant to him until they were gone.

* * *

“I’m hereby calling this weekly meeting to order.”

Ryuji sneered and didn’t look up from his phone. “Who died and made you queen?”

“Nobody, but let me remind you that three of you literally chose that as my code name. Excuse me for taking the initiative here when clearly nobody else was.”

“Ignore him,” Ann said, rolling her eyes. “We’re all a little on edge, we haven’t had any good news in a week. What have you found?”

Makoto coughed into her fist. “Unfortunately, nothing on my end. My sister, as well as the rest of her department, is looking for any evidence… but nothing’s come up yet. But it’s only been a few weeks and they’re looking into a very old, very secretive case! They still might find something. Anyone else?”

The answers were the same all around.

Ryuji stretched and looked back at the room once more before heading for the stairs.

“Where are you going?”

“I dunno. We’re stuck, and sitting here isn’t going to fix it.”

“You can’t just _leave_ ,” Makoto insisted.

“Why do we even still hold these meetings? And why in his room of all places? As if we need any more reminders that he’s not coming back.”

“There’s no need to go that far,” Haru said quietly. “We’re all doing our best to save him, it’s just more difficult than we anticipated.”

“I’d rather be out there doing anything else, instead of sitting in a dusty room in a dusty café, waiting for a miracle that’ll never happen.” Futaba opened her mouth to protest but he kept going. “Guys, it’s been almost a _month_. I’ve watched enough crime shows to know that prison is a scary place, and not even Akira could last in a place like that. Even if we manage to get him out, he’s not gonna be the same person.”

Ann frowned. “They didn’t send him to _prison_ , they sent him to juvie.”

“World famous criminals don’t go to juvie.”

“And high schoolers don’t go to prison!”

“I think one of those outweighs the other, and it’s not the high schooler thing!”

“None of it even matters because Sojiro said he’d probably be put in solitary confinement,” Futaba muttered.

“You’re not making this any better!”

Yusuke and Haru watched as the three of them fought. “We’re lost without him,” the former said flatly.

“None of us had any real connection outside of him,” the girl agreed. “Without him to hold us together, there’s nothing.”

There was the sound of heavy footsteps on the stairs and Sojiro appeared a moment later, looking tired. “What’s going on up here?”

“Nothing,” Ryuji said sourly, “I was just leaving.”

“I was about to bring up some drinks, are you sure?”

“Yeah, I don’t think I can stand it up here anymore. Thanks for all the times you’ve let us use the café.”

“Ryuji, wait--” Ann started.

He was already gone, and Makoto ran a hand through her hair. “Should we stop for today?”

“It might be best if we don’t hold these meetings for awhile,” Haru said softly. “At least until we get some kind of good news.”

Futaba gave a noncommittal hum and Yusuke kept his head down, trying not to look at all the souvenirs along the walls from their adventures.

“...You might be right. I’ll be sure to message everyone if there’s any news, alright?”

Everyone was already grabbing their things and she sighed.

_We need you, Akira. More than we realized._

* * *

He couldn’t sleep. Again.

The insomnia had started maybe a week or two into his sentence. He desperately wanted to just shut off his brain for a few hours, but instead was left squinting at the ceiling tiles. He couldn’t even sleep on his stomach and try to bury himself in his pillow or he’d get punished, as he’d learned very early.

He closed his eyes tight and tried to picture his room back at Leblanc, and when he opened them he could almost see the stars on the ceiling.

Visiting the planetarium with Yusuke had been fun, they’d had a good laugh about Mishima thinking him sketchy and gone back the next week to see the show.

He wanted to write down his memories again, before he forgot them. If his journaling was up to date, he’d been there for twenty six days. Everything had started to blur together. He’d wake up, have his room inspected, and breakfast would be brought to him. Work was delivered, something menial like putting together parts for some machine he couldn’t figure out, and then he was given dinner and taken to the baths. After that he wrote his daily activities and slept, and the cycle repeated. After that first day where things were explained to him, everything was done in silence.

_Twenty seven_ , he thought, squinting at the ceiling.

Moonlight barely illuminated the room, just enough that he could make out the shape of things. Not that he could see much more than that without contacts or glasses anyway. Only one thing in the room was clear, and he squeezed his eyes shut.

When he opened them again it was gone and he breathed a sigh of relief. The hallucinations hadn’t started long ago, about the same time as the insomnia. He could usually tell that something was fake if it was in focus.

He yawned and rolled to his side, where _something_ was looking at him. It was a black blob about the size of Morgana, and it looked at him with wide eyes.

_It’s not real_ , he told himself, closing his eyes again. When he opened them it was still there and he startled upright. Tentatively, he reached out a hand and it passed through the creature.

That was new.

He had a feeling he wouldn’t be sleeping much the rest of the night.

* * *

Ryuji’s phone buzzed and he glanced at it just long enough to see that it was Makoto.

_Not going to answer it. Probably just asking for an update, which nobody ever has any news._

The ringing persisted and he turned away, arms crossed. “No,” he said aloud. “Not doing this.”

Finally it stopped and he went back to his game. He’d only been playing for a minute when it started again.

“ _Fine_ ,” he hissed, answering it. “I don’t have any updates! Nobody has any updates! I’m not going back to Leblanc until we have _something_ , and nobody ever has any--”

_“We found the woman.”_

He nearly dropped the phone. “What?”

_“That reporter Akira knew, Ohya, she did a lot of digging around his neighborhood. She found women who lived nearby and were within the age range Akira described. My sister helped me run the list and we got a match.”_

“Do the others know?”

_“I was in the middle of calling all of them. I figured this couldn’t wait until we held a meeting.”_

“Holy shit,” he breathed. “What happens next?”

_“We reach out to her and find out what really happened that night. My sister’s going to help with that part as well, because she probably won’t want to talk to a bunch of high schoolers.”_

He couldn’t stop grinning. “This is actually happening? For real?”

_“We’re one step closer to getting him back.”_

“I’ll let you handle the serious stuff then, but lemme know if I can help with anything! I want him back as soon as possible.”

_“Thanks, Ryuji. I’ll keep you updated.”_

As soon as the call ended he ran downstairs and found his mother in the kitchen.

“What’s the rush? Hey, what happened?”

He hugged her tightly. “We finally got a break,” he said, fighting back tears. “I think he’s gonna come home soon.”

“Ryuji--!”

“I’m going to Leblanc, I’ll let you know when I’m coming back. And I can pick up something for dinner if you want, just call me. I might have to go away for a day or two to talk to her, but I don’t even know when that would happen. I’ll let you know once it’s all figured out!”

* * *

Forty seven days… or maybe it was forty eight. He’d lost track a week ago. There was no point in journaling if nothing ever changed. He tried to focus on the food in front of him but he could barely keep his eyes open. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept through the night. Every little sound, from the wind outside to the heavy footsteps of guards in the hallway, had him on high alert and he couldn’t sleep for more than an hour or two at a time. The hallucinations had only gotten worse, and now he was pretty sure he was hearing things as well.

He must have nodded off, because he was woken up by the door swinging open and instinctively kept his head down.

“Nineteen.”

_It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real--_

_“Nineteen.”_

He clamped his hands over his ears and tried to curl in on himself. It would go away, just like all the others.

He stumbled as someone kicked him and finally looked up. A very angry guard was looking down at him.

“On your feet. Now.”

He did as he was told and followed him out of the room, only looking up enough to make sure he wouldn’t trip.

They stopped in front of a door like all the others and he was ushered inside. The room was divided in two by a large window, with a chair on either side. He took a seat and fought to stay awake, his eyes closing on their own. Not even the excitement of something new was enough to stave off the exhaustion.

He heard footsteps and the scratch of the other chair, but didn’t have the strength to lift his head.

“Akira…”

That was enough to jolt him awake. Nobody had used his name in… months, at least.

The person on the other side of the glass was one of the last he expected, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t happy to see them nonetheless.

“Sae-san,” he said, his voice cracking.

“It’s been awhile.”

He could tell that she was trying not to stare.

“I have some news you’ll be interested in. Masayoshi Shido has finally been prosecuted, and will most likely be found guilty. He’s admitted to all of his crimes, although we only have evidence for the ones that took place outside the metaverse.”

Shido. He’d nearly forgotten about that. How many days had it been? Forty seven, he was pretty sure… or maybe it was forty eight. He just knew it felt like years.

“The other news is that starting today, you’re a free man. Shido’s confession brought light to the truth of your case. We were able to prove your innocence in the original assault charge that led to your arrest. It was all thanks to the others, of course. They’ve worked almost nonstop since the beginning, and they even tracked down the victim in your case and brought her in as a witness. And that wasn’t all… An unbelievable amount of support has come in from other places as well. You have a lot of people looking out for you, and I’m sure they’ll be very interested in seeing you soon.”

“I… get to leave?”

“All of the paperwork has been finalized and there’s a car waiting for you out front. All that’s left is to collect your belongings. I’ll see you on the other side.”

He was led back to the front, where everything had started almost two months earlier. He was handed a bag of stuff he barely recognized.

“Akira Kurusu, you’re hereby a free man.”

A guard escorted him to the front and he watched the gate slowly rise.

Freedom… it felt like a foreign concept.

A car horn went off and he jumped. “Get in already, it’s cold out,” Sojiro called.

He threw his stuff in the trunk and blinked at the sudden light. Had the sun always been that bright?

The man rummaged in his coat pocket for something before handing it over. “Futaba told me the situation with your glasses. They’re an old pair of hers, but she said the prescription was pretty close to your contacts. They should do for now.”

He put on the glasses and immediately drew back at how clear everything looked.

Sojiro gave him a once over. “You look like hell, kid. Everyone’s waiting for you back home, although I’m not sure they’ll recognize you like this. Your hair’s a mess, you’re even thinner than I remember, and you look like you haven’t slept in a month.”

They drove in silence for awhile, until the man apparently couldn’t take it anymore.

“You’re even quieter than usual. What happened in there?”

“A… A lot,” he managed.

“Yeesh, your voice. Haven’t spoken to anyone in some time, have you?. Alright, you can stay quiet with me. But I doubt your friends will let you.”

He looked as though he wanted to say something else but didn’t, and Akira looked out the window. It had been a long time since he’d actually seen the sky, or anything that was outside that room, for that matter.

“Kid, listen,” he said after awhile, breaking the silence again. “I treated you poorly when you first came to town, and… for a long time after that, really. And I’ve regretted it ever since. It didn’t matter if I thought you were some kind of delinquent or not, I should’ve let you prove yourself. God, I… I didn’t even clean out that attic for you. And you just took it all in stride never complaining or anything.”

“I didn’t want you to kick me out,” he said quietly. “And I got used to the rumors and everything at school, so it didn’t bother me much for it to happen at Leblanc too.”

“And so you paid for a crime you didn’t commit, over and over again.”

He didn’t answer, but it wasn’t really a question.

The rest of the drive was silent, and he watched as the roads became familiar again. They arrived at Leblanc before long and he hesitated outside the door.

“Go on, they’re waiting for you.”

Before he even managed to step inside someone was hugging him and he stiffened up, his heart racing. He couldn’t think clearly. When was the last time he’d been touched?

“Akira…?”

He realized everyone was staring at him and he slowly pulled Futaba away from him.

“Dude, you look like _shit_.”

“ _Ryuji_ ,” someone hissed, and he yelped as they smacked him.

“Oh come on, we were all thinking it!”

“Let’s all just sit down and give Akira some room. There’s a lot to talk about but we’ll take it at his pace.”

He was grateful for Makoto’s clear thinking and slid into a booth. He resisted the urge to move away as Ann sat next to him, too close for comfort. Futaba and Makoto were across from him, with Haru, Ryuji, and Yusuke at the counter. Sojiro had disappeared somewhere, probably out to get cigarettes. The room felt cramped and he swallowed thickly as they all looked at him expectantly.

“We actually did it,” Haru said, unable to contain her smile.

“Hell yeah we did!”

Akira tried to smile but he still couldn’t hide the flinch at the sudden noise.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Ann placed a hand on his shoulder and it was just too much, he pulled away from her and nearly fell out of the booth. His heart was racing and all he could hear was how he was practically panting.

“I’m fine,” he managed. His voice cracked at the end and it was clear nobody believed him.

“I’m sure it’s been a long day for you. We’ll let you get settled back in and we can do this another time.”

“Yeah, we don’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything. I’m sure it was super rough in there.”

He wanted them to _stop talking_. Everything was so loud and it was all he could do to not cover his ears.

“Just don’t forget that we want to help, okay? Anything we can do, we will.”

“Yeah, we’re just a text away.”

Finally they all left and he retreated to the attic. Everything was how he’d left it, save for the layer of dust now covering it all. He shook out the comforter and tried to stop his hands from shaking.

He was _free_. He was the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts, and he’d handled far worse than a month and a half on his own. He wasn’t supposed to be shaken by something so trivial.

That’s what he believed, anyway. But the way that his body reacted to everything said otherwise.

* * *

He jolted awake and yelped as he hit his head on something. Slowly his heart stopped racing and he realized he wasn’t on his futon in that awful room. He wasn’t in bed at Leblanc, either. He was… sitting at his desk, with lockpicks scattered around him. The other thing that caught his eye was the fact that Sojiro’s books and loose things, which had been piled up in the corner, had disappeared and the space was instead filled with things of Akira’s.

He crept downstairs and saw Sojiro washing dishes and whistling to some jingle on TV.

“Ah, you’re awake. Don’t worry about school, that’s all been taken care of. I don’t think you’d be able to go back there anyway. Not after disappearing for a second time without a word.”

“The attic is clean,” he said, risking a glance at the man.

“I told you yesterday, didn’t I? I felt bad that I never cleaned it out after you got here. Better late than never, I suppose.”

“Why not while I was… gone?”

“Didn’t even think about it. Everyone was just so focused on getting you back, I don’t think anyone thought about what would actually happen when we did. I tried to wake you before I left last night but you were out cold at the desk, so I took the time to clean up a bit. Where’s that cat when you need him, hmm?”

He’d nearly forgotten about Morgana.

Sojiro slid a plate in front of him. “What were they feeding you anyway?”

He took a bite of the curry and nearly choked on it. He’d forgotten just how spicy Sojiro made it.

“So, any big plans for today? Going to gather everyone here again? Or visit all your friends in the city and let them know you’re back?”

Just the thought of going into the city made his stomach turn. “I was thinking about helping out here today, if you don't mind.”

“I’ll always accept help, but you don’t have to. Won’t your friends be worried?”

“I’ll message them. I want to do something quiet today.”

Sojiro studied him for a minute. “There’s always dishes to be washed and coffee to be brewed, if you’re feeling up to it.”

His hands stopped shaking as he scrubbed at the dishes and fell into a familiar pattern. He didn’t even hear the bell above the door ring, and a mug slipped from his hand as someone called his name. It shattered and he flinched again, and he instinctively dropped to his knees and grabbed for the larger pieces.

“Sorry,” Futaba said sheepishly, helping him clean. “I actually came here to give you something. Well, I’m willing to lend it to you, I want it back eventually.”

They finished quickly and she reached into her bag. “Try to contain your excitement, because you’re about to become the temporary owner of… these!” She brandished a pair of headphones.

Akira just stared at her blankly.

“Alright, maybe you’re not a huge tech person so you don’t recognize them by sight alone. These are a pair of AKG K845BT headphones.”

“And?”

“ _And_?” she demanded. “These are considered the absolute best headphones when it comes to a mix of sound quality and noise cancelation!”

He still didn’t react and she groaned dramatically. “Do I really have to spell it out for you?”

Nothing.

She sighed. “Fine, I’ll be serious. I don’t know exactly how you’re feeling or what you went through, but I went through some stuff of my own. Even after you guys stole my heart and helped me, I wasn’t just… _fixed_. Going out around people is still hard sometimes.” She refused to look at him. “...Being alone is hard sometimes, too. And I’ve found that music helps, so I wanted to offer you a pair of good headphones until you’re comfortable again. The noise cancelling part is what you’ll probably appreciate the most, the good sound quality is just a bonus. No point listening to good music on bad headphones.”

He still made no move to take them from her and she put them on his head, careful not to catch his glasses.

“What do you think? They look good, if nothing else.”

“I can still hear you,” he said quietly.

She grinned and chose a song at random from her phone. He stiffened up as the music started but relaxed again.

“Well?” she asked.

“What?”

“I asked what you thought of them.”

“ _What_?”

She laughed and paused the song. “Noise cancelling.”

Even he cracked a small smile at that. “Thank you.”

“I won’t ask what you went through, and I’ll let you get back to those dishes before Sojiro gets back. Just… remember that everyone does want to help, even if they don’t really understand that they’re usually making things worse. Oh, and if you ever need song recommendations, I’ve got you! We can make playlists for all kinds of moods! I’ve already got some artists you absolutely _have_ to listen to--”

She wasn’t watching where she was going and walked right into Sojiro, who was back from the supermarket down the street. “Are you here to help as well? I’m sure I could find something for you to do, even if it’s just wiping down tables.”

“I just remembered something really urgent I have to do for… uh… school! Yeah! Gotta work on that, see you later!”

Akira folded his apron and adjusted the headphones around his neck. “I finished most of the dishes, I think I’m going to go into the city and see some people. Do you want me to get Futaba to help finish up?”

Sojiro smirked. “I think I can manage on my own. Go have fun.”

He hesitated, unsure what to say, before nodding and starting towards the train station. He shuffled his music and opened his messages, and selected the first name he saw.

[Akira - 4:14 PM: is there still a job waiting for me? or did you find another part-timer while i was gone?]

He got a response almost immediately. [Iwai - 4:15 PM: as if kaoru would let me hire anyone else. there’s plenty of work waiting for you. we’ve missed you, kid.]

**Author's Note:**

> We're finishing out 2019 by throwing all of the bad stuff at Akira, and in 2020 we're giving him the break he deserves.
> 
> note: i did plenty of research on correctional facilities of all kinds for this and came to mixed conclusions. Akira is a world-known criminal, but he's also still a minor. Japanese prisons also have more of a focus on reform rather than just waiting for the sentence to finish (like in American facilities), and are known for being very strict in both punishment and daily operations. For this reason, I chose to put him in a juvenile correctional facility rather than a full prison, because he would be in solitary either way. The other inmates are around his age but treated that way, whereas Akira is treated like the criminal everyone thinks he is.


End file.
